Kindness
Say their name.
How does it feel when someone says your loved one’s name? Do you feel the permission to say your loved one’s name around others?
Is there a memory or a story that someone has shared about your loved one that you cherish? Take some time to grieve this loss.
Is there someone you can reach out to this week to share in your grief? What would it look like to ask them to share a memory or story about your loved one?
Share your story.
What is your story of loss and grief? Take some time to grieve this loss.
What has your experience been sharing your grief and loss with others? Has your story changed over time?
What would it look like to reach out to someone this week to share your story of loss with them?
Accepted.
What are your barriers to being honest about your feelings in grief? How have relationships changed while you have grieved? Take some time to grieve these changes.
What are some things people have said that make you feel validated and accepted as you grieve?
Is there someone that makes you feel accepted and validated while you grieve? What would it look like to be honest about your feelings with someone this week?
Milestones in grief.
What have been some of the hardest milestones in the grief process? Give yourself time to grieve your loss.
How have others supported you during your grief process? What kind of support do you need now?
What would it look like to share your needs with someone this week? Is there someone you can reach out to as you grieve?
Walking through grief.
What questions do you ask as you grieve? What questions remain unanswered? Give yourself time to grieve your loss.
What role, if any, has prayer had in your grief journey? What would your prayer or wish be in your current circumstances?
Is there someone that is walking through grief with you right now? What would it look like to reach out to someone this week to share or pray?
Looking Back.
What is one of your favorite memories to tell of your loved one? What memory is hard to share about your loved one? Take some time to grieve these changes.
Has anyone taken time to remember your loved one with you? What memories did they share with you?
What would it look like to share your grief with someone this week? Is there a memory that has been on your mind recently?
Assisted.
What chores have been burdensome while you have grieved? How was this different prior to your loss? Take some time to grieve these changes.
Has anyone gone out of their way to help you with responsibilities since your loss? Take some time to reflect on this kindness.
What would it look like to ask for assistance with responsibilities? Is there someone you can invite into your grief journey?
Invited.
How has your housing or the feeling about your home changed since your loss? Take time to grieve these changes.
Do you feel invited into other’s homes and lives as you grieve? How has grief changed the way you relate to others in day to day life?
What would it look like to invite someone into your grief?
Messages of Kindness.
What message would you like to get from your loved one today? Take time to grieve this loss.
How has communication changed since your loss? How does it make you feel to receive messages from others?
Is there someone who has reached out to you in your grief? What would it look like to respond to them and share your grief with them?
Driving through grief…
What memories do you have in the car with your loved one?
How has driving changed since your loss? Take time to grieve these changes.
Is there any aspect of driving or driving responsibilities you wish you could share with someone else? What would it look like to reach out to someone to ask for help while grieving?
When celebrating…
How have celebrations or events/holidays been different since your loss? Give yourself permission to grieve these changes.
Do you feel like you can find joy at these times? Similarly do you feel like you have permission to grieve when celebrations are occurring?
Is there someone who gives room for you to grieve in the midst of a joyous occasion or a celebration? What would it look like to reach out to someone and share your grief around these events?
Going to this place…
Are there any places that are hard to visit since the loss of your loved one?
What about that place compounds your grief? How was it different prior to your loss? Give yourself time to grieve these changes.
Is there someone that you can reach out to in your grief? Is there a way that they can help you face that place or the demands in the midst of your grief?
A Message…
Can you recall a time time where a loved one reached out to you to check on you or to let you know they were thinking of you? Write about this memory.
If your loved one were to send a message to you now, what can you imagine it would say. Take some time to grieve your loss.
Is there someone that has stepped in to remind you that you aren’t alone as you grieve? Is there someone you could reach out to today to grieve with?
Over Coffee…
If you were sitting in front of your loved one for coffee or tea, what would you want to share with them? What would you want to share with them?
Does this image bring up a memory of a time when your loved one or someone else offered you kindness? Maybe by treating you to coffee or by reaching out to offer support?
Is there anyone you want to invite for coffee/tea? How can you share in your grief?
Share Your Grief
Before your loss, how did you share your grief with loved ones? Allow yourself to grieve these changes as needed.
As you grieve now, has anyone shared in your grief? How have they done this?
How could you let someone in as you grieve now? How could you share in grief with one another? The first step is always vulnerable.
Connection
How did you used to connect with your loved one? What is one way you continue to connect with them? Ie through others, listening to nostalgic music, looking at pictures? Give yourself time to grieve these changes?
How could you use your connection with someone else to make space to grieve your loss of connection to your loved one?
Are you at a place where you could support someone else grieving? What potential connection could you have?
Be Available
What errand, appointment, or task has been more difficult in grief?
When was the last time you did that errand, appointment, or task? Describe that experience. Allow yourself to grieve the changes in your life since then.
Is there a friend or loved one that could accompany you the next time? What would that look like? How would it be the same or different?
“Let them cry”
When was the last time you cried? Do you allow yourself to cry or do you hold back your tears?
Is there anyone you feel comfortable crying with or gives you permission to express your emotions?
Is there anyone that has also experienced your loss that you could spend some time with? If so, consider how you can give them permission to express their emotions.
Holiday Kindness
How have your holidays changed while grieving? Allow yourself to grieve these changes.
Has anyone helped you redefine how you recognize/celebrate holidays while grieving?
Is there anyone that you could invite into your holiday experience that would help you cope through the changes?
Offer Kindness
Has anyone served you this week?
What is a way that you can serve someone this week?
Is there any way that an insecurity has created a barrier to you reaching out for help or to serve another?
You Listened
Is there someone who has listened to you in your grief?
What did you share? Is there something you want to share right now?
How did they respond? How did their response make you feel?